| THE BEST MEDICINEf- LAUGH! FIRST DOSE There are always two ways to look at everything, I guess. My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion last October, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife noticed me staring and asked me, "Do you know her?". "Yes", I sighed, "She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since." "My God!" says my wife, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?" Got a Joke? E-mail it to us: frontpage@collectivewizdom .com |
| THE BEST MEDICINE- LAUGH! SECOND DOSE Last night, my friend and I were sitting in the living room and I said to her, "I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug." She got up, unplugged the TV, and threw out my wine |
Letter to My Son-- Practical Tips on Living
May 12, 2008, updated November 8, 2008
By Sam Garvino, Associate Editor and Featured Columnist
Dear Son,
You are growing up. These days I look at you and I can still
see my baby boy. But you're not my baby boy any more.
You're becoming a man. Sometimes you look at me and I
know you want to ask me something but I look away and
you can't find a way to ask. But I know the look. It's the
same one I used to give my old man when I was your age.
So I have decided to write this letter to you to give you
some new Facts of Life to help you navigate a more
complicated world than the one I faced.
Pornography. Yes. You are maturing. The pleasure you get
from anything-- food, sex, visual stimulation -is just one part
of a very big life. Balance it with exploring the real world, as
you are starting to do. On their death bed, nobody ever asks
to see one more porn flick.
Pornography and sex are 2 different things. Don't confuse
the two. Pornography is make believe. So, guys who don't
like to indulge in make believe sex may simply prefer the real
thing. Keep it real, son.
Masturbation. As with any natural behavior, you should
make sure you keep your enjoyment from distorting your
overall life. This goes for exercise, sex, eating, whatever.
Balance is the key.
Masturbation is natural. But keep in mind that you need to
lead a balanced life, one that includes pleasure but is not
dominated solely by the drive to attain pleasure.
Walk. Your heart beats 70 times on average every minute. If
you take care of yourself, it will strengthen your heart and it
may only beat 50 or 60 times a minute. Over a year, it could
save you 5,256,000 beats. What I am saying this to you, a
young man? Well, your heart is like a car. It'll wear out
sooner if you're always gunning the motor. So take a walk
every day. Start now. Make it a habit. You'll find it
strengthens your heart and clears your mind.
Pray. Listen, no body ever dies an atheist. Everybody looks
to a higher source to figure this world out. That little voice
inside of you that gets scared sometimes is your soul asking
for power from the spiritual engine of the universe. Get
plugged into that source and you'll never run our of energy
and resourcefulness and strength.
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